Where you can read the relatively rational ramblings of a silly half-monkey, half-boy. This freak of nature is named Joel. He also responds to the name 'Bart Wang'.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

W.I.J.H.I.T.M.

Hello friends! Bart Wang is back on the Internet, in spite of the Bell's repeated screw-ups. We've moved. We're in our new house, which we own. Well, I suppose the bank owns it at this exact moment because we haven't made one mortgage payment yet. The move was eventful. The good? We have lots of friends. They are an incredible blessing. We had a lot of people help us out in our afternoon of need. I have thanked God for Chad, Darren, Karen, Katie, Josh, Melanie Ramsay, Steve-o, Taxman as well as Melanie's parents, Chris & Jane, Chris' best friend, Dave. My dad also helped out at the house, setting up our washer and dryer. We couldn't have done it without them and we are honoured to have such great people in our lives.

The bad... Oh, there's plenty. Bell, as I mentioned, screwed up. Again. Multiple times. They didn't install the satellite correctly, they didn't set up our phone for the whole weekend (though they didn't call to tell me they weren't showing up for our appointment) and then they kept us on the phone for an hour and a half because of their mistakes. I got angry and let them know. They miraculously freed up someone Monday when they told me no one would be out until Wednesday. Two days after moving in, the furnace died. Well, the motor for the fan died. We were without heat for two days. Clough Energy (whom my dad has used) told us they would show up but then didn't. The second guy told Melanie that they don't work after 4PM. Oh, well, they do if you pay three hours labour ($600) regardless of the outcome. SCREW YOU! Then some other guy showed up the next day from another heating company and tried to do a cash deal immediately before telling us it would be almost double the cost to do it legitimately. He ended up buying us a motor (he told us the general public could not buy a motor and only people with their gas ticket could do so - a lie) and my sister's husband, Al, and his friend, Jay, saved our freezing asses. Thanks, guys!
It could have been worse, right? I know. But that doesn't put money back in my account or make me feel lucky. Anyhow, we're in and we're getting organized, slowly but surely.

'W.W.J.D.' is so 2001. This sermon kicked ass and introduced me to the acronym that titles this post. Instead, we should follow this one. So much for all the crappy bracelets and keychains. However, getting a better life out of the deal? I suppose we can forgo further commercializing Jesus.

Dig this. Stephen Colbert of The Colbert Report is a funny man. He has a segment on the show (which I am watching for the first time) called 'The Word'. Today's word is 'Jesi', as in 'multiple Jesuses'. You can watch the clip here, which is well worth the couple minutes. It's hilarious and scathing at the same time.

I once wrote an article for Building Adam (R.I.P.) about Rev. Fred Phelps and his aggressive hatred of homosexuality, gays, lesbians, bisexuals and every other owner of a non-heterosexual orientation. His is the group that is known for protesting Matthew Shepard's funeral and registering www.godhatesfags.com. His vitriol is pretty astounding and ignorant. Breukelaar sent me an article in which the journalist wonders if Fred's hatred is truly directed inward rather than outward.

Damn, this post is full of good shit for you to read. Here's an article that I want all my single friends (especially you fine young ladies - you know who you are because I've tried to tell you that's who you are for some time now) to read. A thoughtful ponderance of the question, 'So, why aren't you married yet?' Sure, it may not set your mind or heart at ease but it's better than the beating you give yourself all too often. You are loved by many people, including me.

Leigh Nash, the wonderful voice of Sixpence None the Richer, is working on a solo album with Sarah McLachlan's producer. So says Rolling Stone. The Vandermark kids are rejoicing!

I wasn't sure how to introduce this next piece. I thought about swearing but then I thought maybe I wouldn't. This can be a 'choose your own introduction'. Here we go...

[A hearty 'fuck you' to Michelin, the world's leading tiremaker.]
OR
[A warm 'up your's' to Michelin, the world's leading tiremaker.]

I stumbled across a little blurb in the Hamilton Spectator as I was folding newspaper for recycling. On February 15th, 2006, it was reported that Michelin's net profit "surged by 36 per cent in 2005 despite sharply rising raw material costs and lower sales volumes." That amounted to profits of $1 billion. That's right - $1,000,000,000. Not bad, eh? To celebrate, Michelin is closing its factory in Kitchener, Ontario, "throwing 1,100 people out of work citing a contracting tire segment and intense cost pressure from imports." YOU EARNED $1 BILLION, YOU HEARTLESS, EVIL MEN!! You appear to be managing the 'contracting tire segment and intense cost pressure from imports' rather well. Again, another company that is not content to make money. They only want to make more money. See why I wanted to use harsh language now?

I'm supposed to hang with Matt Armstrong this evening. He's a good dude. I don't see him much so we're being intentional to kick it tonight. We're going to hook up with Josh, Darren, Ramage and Darren's friends to watch UFC 58 tonight - Canada versus the U.S. I guess I could apply W.I.J.H.I.T.M. to this. What do you think Jesus' perspective on sports/activites that involve physical combat? I'm not sure. Until I figure it out, I hope the Canadian fighters mess up the American dirtbags. Hahahaha.

Before I go, I'll leave you with links to two mash-ups involving my boy, Sufjan Stevens. I was surprised to see that his music was used but pleased. These mash-ups are decent too. Check 'em out at your leisure.

Two-faced John McCartney presents Sufjan Stevens vs. Kanye West - Zombies Walk!!

Aggro1 delivers Sufjan Stevens vs. Christina Aguilera - Peninsular Makeover

Have a good night, everyone! That includes you too, Steve-o.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

yo yo yo HC joel is on a rampage!
hope you are well - one day i will have time to sit read through some of the political essays and stuff you've been sending - i admire your passion and knowledge in this area - i feel slightly ignorant to a lot of this stuff.

wanted to let you know i have been back into the blog action and got a podcast going too:

http://www.anniedale.com/blog/

take it easy ----- see you on msn sometime ------- joe nanderson

12:56 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow! easy tiger! Do you kiss your wife with that same mouth? Try punching a heavy bag or going for a run to work out the fustration.

1:52 AM

 

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